Try my editing P-E-N

Dear Legal Writer, We’ve all been there: The brief is done, but it’s several pages too long. You’ve got a few hours to try to cut it before the filing deadline, and you can’t afford to lose substance.

What’s your first move?

Try my P-E-N approach. It kills the culprits behind 3 biggies behind empty words:

—Passives
—Expletives
—Nominalizations

1: PASSIVES. (Culprit: “by the”)

Root out passive voice by searching for sentences containing “by the.” That’s the most common signal for passive voice. Passive voice is always LONGER than active voice.

“The bill was passed by the Senate.” (Passive/longer)

“The Senate passed the bill.” (Active/shorter)

–
2: EXPLETIVES: (Culpits: “It is” & “There are”)

Both two-word phrases are almost always useless expletives. They take up space without adding value. Cut them, and make your subject carry out the verb.

“There are three factors that courts consider. They are: _”

“Three factors the court considers are __”

“The court considers these three factors: __”

–
3: NOMINALIZATIONS. (That’s just a fancy way to say clunky noun clauses that can be converted into verbs.)

make arrangement for –> arrange

provide a description of –> describe

take the deposition of —> depose

*Without the nominalizations, the texts are shorter.

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Won’t you try my simple P-E-N approach to cut words today?

Fondly,
Amanda

P.S. I’ve collected my legal-writing posts at #DearLegalWriter.

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