Dear Legal Writer, If I had a dollar for every time someone on The Bachelor used “myself” incorrectly . . .

— “The date was amazing for Brad and myself.”
— “Sarah and myself have a real connection.”
— “This journey has really helped myself grow.”

❌ NO! NO! NO!
(Somewhere, a grammar teacher is sobbing into a rose.)

Unfortunately, The Bachelor has broad reach.

The show’s prevalent use of “myself” has caused the word to show up—incorrectly—in an increasing number of professional contexts.

For example:
— “Please email the document to Sarah or myself.”
— “Your draft will be reviewed by the partners and myself.”
— “Between you and myself, the client is a nightmare.”

❌ Again, NO! NO! NO!

In each case, “myself” should simply be “me.”

That’s because pronouns like “myself,” “yourself,” and “himself” are called “reflexive pronouns,” meaning they all need something for the “self” to reflect back to. They can’t just stand alone.

So if you’ve never said “I” earlier in the sentence, you can never use “myself” in the sentence—because it has nothing to reflect back to.

🔷 The ONLY times “myself” works are when:

1–You’re reflecting an action you did to yourself:
“I accidentally sent the draft to myself.” ✅

2–You’re emphasizing yourself—and it’s still tied to an earlier “I”:
“I’ll handle the edits myself.” ✅

That’s it. Two valid roles. No spin-offs.

So, dear legal writer, the next time you find yourself using “myself,” STOP.

Cross it out.
Use “me” instead.
(Then you can give yourself a rose. 🌹)

💌 Amanda

#DearLegalWriter

📬 What other reality-TV-isms have you seen creep into professional writing?