Do you give “TLs”?
I hope you start!
Giving a TL to someone means relaying a compliment about them that came from another person (i.e., from a complimenter you heard or overheard.)
Here’s an example:
I hear a senior partner say that your brief was particularly well-written.
➡️ I relay that compliment to you.
👉 That’s a TL.
Here’s another:
I hear our professor say that your question in class was insightful.
➡️ I tell you that.
🔆 That might make your day!
My mom taught me about TLs (or at least how our family understands them), and we’ve been doing them ever since I was little. I’ve passed the tradition on to friends and new family, and I hope you’ll take to them, too.
🗳️ Might you pass along a TL to someone today?
Try one out & see how widely the recipient smiles!
In the world of lawyers and law students, we could really use some more TLs these days.
Fondly,
💌 Amanda
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P.S. If you’re curious about the origins of TL & what it stands for, the results may disappoint, for the original, historical meaning carried some baggage (about which I am glad I didn’t know until recently).
TL officially stands for “trade-last.”
—My reaction? “Yuck.” Trade-last?
{I’d been sure there was a “love” in there somewhere.)
Even worse, according to Merriam-Webster, the meaning of “trade-last” is:
“a complimentary remark by a third person that a hearer offers to repeat to the person complimented if 𝙝𝙚 𝙤𝙧 𝙨𝙝𝙚 𝙬𝙞𝙡𝙡 𝙛𝙞𝙧𝙨𝙩 𝙧𝙚𝙥𝙤𝙧𝙩 𝙖 𝙘𝙤𝙢𝙥𝙡𝙞𝙢𝙚𝙣𝙩 𝙢𝙖𝙙𝙚 𝙖𝙗𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙝𝙚𝙖𝙧𝙚𝙧.” (*Emphasis added.)
—Double yuck! I’ve NEVER used TLs that way. Why should there be a rule that you must give a TL to get one?
🌟 I say:
🔹 Give a TL when you have one.
🔹 Expect nothing in return.
🔹 You might just make someone’s day—and your own.
P.P.S. TLs originated in Maud Hart Lovelace’s early-1900s series of children’s and YA novels, “Betsy-Tacy.” See Sadie Stein, “Trading Places,” Paris Review (March 19, 2014).
As Stein reports:
“In the four books that take place around Deep Valley High School, Betsy and her beloved ‘Crowd’ frequently exchange ‘trade-lasts,’ or TLs, as they are known. It is customary, when given a TL, to return the favor at some point.”
“If you keep your ears open, ‘TL’ can also be found in old movies and the occasional radio show. I don’t know when or why it fell out of fashion; it is an eminently useful and civilized practice that eliminates a lot of social difficulty and encourages the repetition of nice things.”
“Time was, the passing on of compliments was so ritualized a part of life that the practice had a name: trade-last.”
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